💀EAR TODAY GONE TOMORROW💀
👁👁BY FELONIOUS ACADEMIC👁👁
💥💥💥I once overdosed hard in my bathroom, patheticly slipping away like fog toasting in the suns heat, just another body folding up doublejointed like a strung out yogi, suffocating under the weight of very own bad choices and even worse luck.
💥💥💥 While I was off chasing the infamous dragon to all of oblivion, my dog, the poor bastard, was staring at mea as usual, like I’m perpetually losing my damn mind. Then, in what I can only assume was either a desperate attempt to wake me the fuck up from an over ezelous nodding stooper of a high, or perhaps just a midnight snack gone horribly wrong, he snapped and tore at my dangling ear lobe and all like it was his favorite goddamn chew toy. That ever living moment wasn’t just some tragedy saved bye way of some poetic hope in guised of a great dane,
💥💥💥even though i did later write a poem about the treched disaster, it was raw pink, ugly, and a fuckin downright ridiculous event That rained Blood gushing with the upmost madness presentation told among the scattered red designs everywhere from the titles to the damn toilet seat. It showed the tale of a man pissing with the worst aim and even worst self control, and for me, well half dead, and a greatdane house broken better, even if hes with zero bedside manners. If that experience was not hitting rock bottom, then where in the hell does the hole end,
💥💥💥shit maybe there’s no bottom at all, just one motherfuckin long, brutal razor blade slide cutting you into the absurd.
💥💥💥After resuscitation from the 6 cans of narcan the hospital took ol Felonious and patched me up,
💥💥💥my doctor looking at me like his eyes hurt to look, ironical, you lost a goddamn ear in order for you to potentially hear and listen, he also said this brain dead suggestion,
💥💥💥“Go follow your dog around when he takes a number 2, see if you can find that darn piece of ear.”
💥💥💥motherfucker, as if I wasn’t already living in some twisted episode of a bad reality show. he wanted me to attempt to play detective for my own goddamn amputated flesh, just another chapter in this novel of my spiraling life.
💥💥💥Not too long after that day this poem followed.
👁👁👁"EAR TODAY GONE TOMORROW"👁👁👁
💀I overdosed on a Tuesday… again
💀This time face first into the royal ceramic grave of my bathroom floor.
💀My pants were halfway down.
💀My soul was halfway out.
💀And somewhere in between death and digestion,
💀my great dane decided my lobe was a snack.
💀He bit my ear fuckin clean off.
💀Not outta hunger, no
💀But perhaps Outta boredom.
💀Or Maybe love.
💀Or perhaps maybe dogs just get curious when their owners turn into beach furniture
💀I woke up screaming as he howled
💀He wagged his tail like he saved me via mouth to mouth, and not mutilation.
💀Theres was Blood. Drool. Revival.
💀And At the ER,
💀some tight wodd doc said
💀“You’re lucky, son.”
💀“Shock to the system saved you.”
💀“Though you might wanna follow your dog around a while
💀hoping to find that chunk of yourself in a pile of his warm digestion.
💀It’s humbling to forfeit an ear, to refuse the suggested absurdity.
💀It’s a quentisental Florida tale cartered up with all the typical fixings.
💀I never got the ear back.
💀But I got something better.
💀Fuckin Perspective
💀Some Scar tissue.
💀And A loyal animal with a taste for self-destruction
💀As much as me.
💀So, Now I carry the ghost of that cartilage like a trophy.
💀And every time someone asks what happened,
💀I say to them,
💀“My dog bit me back to life.”
